Friday, March 06, 2009

You know you're a grownup when.....

There are times in a girl's life when it is clear she has crossed the line from young woman to adulthood. It's funny what defines us.

My first grown up moment came when I got a vacuum cleaner for Christmas one year. And I was DELIGHTED to get it.

Another grown up moment came in 1997 when my mother bought me my Kitchen Aid mixer for Christmas. A real live, honest-to-God Kitchen Aid, with a personalized mixing bowl. I still have that mixer and I love it. And it's amazing I've not burned it up yet.

Paying off my first car and student loan, getting fired (not once, but twice!), falling in love, getting married, and buying a house.....yes, all grown up moments.

Of course, I totally felt like a grownup the day we brought LittleG home from the hospital. Ohmygosh, am I really a MOTHER??

I've been a wife now for just shy of a decade, and I've been a mother for more than five years. And yet, recently, I felt more like a grown up than ever before.

I was debating with a dear friend the relative merits of our motherhood skills. We were discussing how hard it is to be everything to everybody and be any good at any of it. I found myself telling my friend and MEANING it that SHE is in fact, the better mom, wife, and worker.

Trust me, sistah has it going on, and she either can't or won't allow herself to see it. And as her friend, I feel inclined to point it out to her.

Me: You are such a good partner, wife, and mommy. Your kids are so lucky to have you.

Her: No way! You are the best Mom ever!

Me: Nuh uh! You are! YOU are the best mom ever. I am just a sham.

Her: Oh no you're not! You are fabulous and I love you and MrG loves you and LittleG loves you. And we will never speak of this again.

Imagine. Lady Steele, modern superhero, the one who put the "I" in competitive, arguing that her friend is better than she, at anything at all. Much less something as important and critical as motherhood.

Sometimes it's hard to be a grownup, and sometimes it's just no contest at all.


Shelly said...

Why do I get the feeling I know who you were talking about? Go MK - You rock at all!!! And you too Lady Steele!!!

Chad and Mary Kate Martin said...

Oh no Shelly she is definitely not talking about me although I do agree with the "Her" in this scenerio. Stephanie is inspiring, generous, and talented. I am blessed enough to see her nearly everyday. She has an ability to help me filter through the madness that is in my brain and even make light of the mountain that really is a molehill. She brings humor in when appropriate but is serious where she needs to be. Her goals are to have a relationship with God, to be a good wife, and to raise a daugther who is just as passionate, polite, and giving as she is. She would like to be successful at her job and be respected for all she brings to the table. How could we not think she is the best mom to LittleG? How could we not think she is absolutely amazing? There is no contest...God seem to do this just right. I understand her feeling of being a sham but that is just a little self doubt trying to peek through - the doubt that each of us has. She only need come see me and I will be happy to remind her how much better my life is calling her friend.

StephanieG said...

Nuh uh!!!